It's a new begining

How ironic it is, when every single time I told myself that it's going to be a *new beginning*, it's actually not. This is the problem with most girls, we are just too optimistic and always hopeful. The statement "what if?" lives with us for the rest of our lives.

We want to break free from a wrong relationship, so we tell ourselves "ok ok ok, this is going be the last time I'm going to chat with him. /It will be the last time I'm going to hear his phone, /It will be the last time I'm going to see him...." "Today will be a new begining!!" However, after the sun came up the next day, we find ourselves fall back to the same trap again.

It is harder for a woman to get off from the train that is going the wrong direction compare to man because we would like to wonders and wonders, what if the train would have a miracle and then go to the direction that we want to.

Nonsense!!

We are wishing honey to come out from the rock. Well, I'm not saying that it is an insane request especially when God is involve in the picture. God can really make honey come out from the rock.

Every hope with God is a possibility , every hope without GOD is just foolishness especially when we wait for cow to drop from heaven!! lol.. ;p

I have problem dealing with relationship. Well, just like every strong man have their weak point. Samson's weak point was on his hair. My weak point is dealing with relationship. Man, I'm a big loser in that, a F students for that subject, and I'm one of them that would resit for that same unit year after years until the North Pole stop giving snow. "When will I learn and graduate from this relationship class?" It is the question that I always wondered.

People often curious when they know that I'm still single. As if they do not believe it. No good reason.. it just that they don't believe at my age I'm still single. However, every kind hearted would try to comfort me by simply says, "Don't worry Ruth I can sense that God will give you one soon....!!" The word soon.. sound like soooooooooooooooooooooon.

It took me many years to truly understand why God did not provide me a life partner sooner than it should be. You see, Our Amazing Loving God will never be late :)

The answer to why God still as me to wait is dan dan dan..... I'm just not ready. God is still equipping me and molding me to be the noble wife for him. Who is him? Superman.. (sorry la.. trying to make a joke ma.) Who is him? dan dan dan... only God knows (lol ;p)

Basically, I do not know who God has prepared for me but I am praying for him everyday for God's protection and God's teaching that he may be a godly man who loves God and have the heart for God's ministry.

God may take awhile to equip me because it was my prayer that I will become a noble wife for him. It is a big prayer... so it's right to wait. Just like a saying "in every good thing it take time" hehehe SS pulak.

Ok enough of my nonsense today... bye.

Today's world!

I am a sinner but I Praise God that in His grace I am saved.

I'm not higher than anyone else or more holy than anyone else... basically, I'm someone who just love Jesus and following Jesus. I do not know everything, all I know is what written in the bible would be the truth, and I would simply follow it.

This morning, I was listening to a few sermons from the preachers in the U.S. and I realized that most of their sermons are talking on false teaching, which has rapidly increased in that continent today.

Many churches has adopted their programs and teachings being culturally relevant but on the other hand they was guilty of watering-down the gospel. All they want is to play church and not saving souls for Jesus Christ. False teaching is indeed the greatest obstacle for Christian in their work to save soul for Jesus Christ.

Many false teachers came out with so many theories that sounded nice and correct in the ear of the hearer, and some even forcefully used the name of Jesus, and used the love of Jesus to enforce their ugly, despicable, wicked ways. Some of them would cleverly used the Word of God to rebuke you and they would make you feel guilty of not accepting their teaching.

I have a very good friend, who was serving in the ministry with me. Sadly. he has went astray and wicked in his way. He is no longer in the ministry. He became involve in homosexuality and start teaching others that Christian should accept homosexual and tattoo. The first time I heard him, I was convinced especially when he told me about the love of Jesus who will not despise sinner. However, later with God's wisdom and grace I soon realized that he was actually using the love I have Jesus to make me feel guilty of hating the sin of homosexuality.

He would revealed to me all those bible passages and stories that show of the love of Jesus to all kind of people esp sinners. He would told me that I should not be fundamental in my thinking and start to open myself to become more liberal because that is the only way I can save more soul for Jesus. I love my Lord Jesus Christ. I truly felt guilty when he said that and that I should not despise the sin of homosexual and should practice more love to sinners.

How wicked is a false teacher. How shameful are them!!!!

I would tell him this. Yes, Jesus love everyone and most of all Jesus love sinners like you and I. Again, I do not claim that I am higher than you because both of us are sinners. But you are wicked by using my love for Jesus to make me feel guilty of hating sins and especially homosexuality. Don't talk to me about Jesus' love for people because you have not love when you teach the young people about things which are not biblical correct. Is this loving Jesus? Don't talk to me about Jesus' love when you encourage the youth to do tattoo? Is this loving Jesus? Don't talk to me about Jesus' love when you sexually violate a young boy. Is this loving Jesus? Don't talk to me about Jesus' love when you are doing the things which God hate? Is this loving Jesus?

Yes, I do hate homosexual people because they have come out with all those theories that sounded nice and right but not biblical, yet they was only trying to make themselves feel better. I hate those who want to sin and then use bible to justify their wicked way and trying to stumble faithful Christian when they just trying to help. Shame on you! However, I am only speaking this as a man. But your Lord, Jesus Christ still loves you.

How my heart burden and crying out to the young generation in today's world that i do not know how more I should emphasis this that knowing the BIBLE is not just important but it is a NECESSITY if we want to survive to be biblical faithful in this wicked generation. We (even myself) need to start praying and soak in His word all the time....

Today...

It has been a long while that I update my blog... ermm I wonder how the regular bloggers maintain an updated account all the time because I realized one week I will be the most consistent blogger and the next moment I would just ....... (silence)

Anyway, today is the first day my little blog clothed with this new dress (again thanks to Andy) so with much respect I should write something.

I'm writing this in the office, almost everyone has left the office except Denice and Munteck who are having choir practice in second floor.. to drown the sound of silence, I'm blasting as loud as possible the Leeland album, which given by Matt... it rocks. Love the Leeland!!

Well, let see what happened today......

Today, it was an interesting day. Sister Kim Chee brought me to meet Pastor David Goh who is humble and lovely pastor that have the gift for healing and ministering. It was a schedule for me to share my trouble with him so he can pray with me. Errrmm.. they mentioned sometime about "inner healing". This was actually my first approach of inner healing. Well, I'm baptist what do you expect ;p

It was ok.. not as scary as I would have thought. I was imagining I would jump off and roll over the floor or something like that (please forgive me.. it's my lack of experience) But he simply led me though a powerful, impact, breakthrough kind of prayer. Healing in relationship with my family and friends. It was coooool... and NO I did not jump off from the chair or roll over the floor. I was on my best appropriate position.. on my knee.

Man, I'm still coughing like nobody business.. I felt as if my lung would fall off anytime.

Thanks for reading my blog, I would try to update more... May the love of Jesus Christ wrap all over you and compels you. Jesus love you.

Woohoo..new dress for my blog!

Thanks to Andy bro.. :)

mission trip in Philippines 09'

Mission Trip Philippine: 19 May – 25 May 2009

PRELUDE
Even though I have been a human being for almost 30 years (This coming 14 October will mark the exact 30 years in planet earth. Purposely mentioning my birthday to everyone... coming soon ahh!!), yet I have no idea what it mean to live. What is the exact value of being a human?

Eventually, we are teaching the new generation that studies and exams were their life, and as they grow up then work will become their life. Is that all the reason to be born into this world? Is life all about getting a good career or to get good grades? If that is the ‘value of life’ that we are teaching our children today then until their 30 years old (like me!!) he or she would still have no idea what life is all about?

In the mission trip in Philippine, I see human’s life in a new light? Being a human is never about ourselves, but it is always about others. The world sucks and that is the truth. Poverty is happening, people are being killed, crimes are rising, people lost their loved ones, children are starving, woman are being abused, a father lost his job, a mother lost her unborn child; with all these pain and hurdle of life, if we are teaching the young generation that life is all about themselves and let’s not care about the matters of the neighbor then human being holds a very sad future. You and I will be living in a very sad world.

*selah

I see life when a 2 years old boy (almost) who has not been eating for 2 days or more was being provided noodle for that evening. It was probably the first solid food he ever tasted since that week.

I see life when the starving parents who also have not been eating any solid food for the week came to the feeding center after we left to eat the leftover.

I see life when a pastor and his wife sacrifice their life, their sleep, their dream and their saving to set up more feeding center so that more hungry children will be fed.

I see life when a sad rough young boy smiled and laughed at the puppet show that was put up by sis Grace and myself. (That smiled melted my heart)

I see life when we kneeled in prayer with these children asking Jesus to save and help them.


DAY ONE (19 May 2009)

The seven of us reached Diasdado Macapagal International Airport at about 10:30AM. Chuan was nearly quarantine in the airport because he had some cough and flu haha.. and the news few months back about the Abu Sayyaf kidnapped the Redcross workers in Philippine are still wondering in my head. I was both excited and thrill of the adventure.

Once we were there, we were being greeted warmly by Pastor Tabadar and his wife, Brother Reuben and his wife Phoebe and also Pastor Titus and his wife. Even before we have the chance to breathe-in the air in Philippine, we were ferried to the first Feeding Center in Amsic, which lead by Pastor Felix.

Pastor Felix explained to us the poor living condition of the villagers in Amsic, some of them even cook with kerosene because they are too poor to buy gas or charcoal. Pastor Felix expressed his concern for the teenagers especially those young ladies who grow up to work in pub or as prostitute. It is because this helps them to earn fast money.

As we were traveling to Amsic we saw many pubs along the way and there were many young ladies who are working for the pubs. As such age, they should be given education and a bright future should have been awaiting them. Unfortunately, because of poverty they don’t stand a chance for both.
Psalm 9: 18 “But the needy will not always be forgotten,
nor the hope of the afflicted ever perish.”

We also visited AMG Skilled Hands Training Center in somewhere that I do not know where. It is a vocational school for teenagers, in giving them training for work. Some of them learn to fix electronic items and some are trained for construction works.

The huge number of girls that are taking the electronic classes impressed me. Wohohoh Girls rules!! Can u imagine when the TV spoiled and the wife said ‘No worries hubby, I can fix it in a minute time! While the boys watched and be amazed FUYOHHH!!

I was truly blessed by the friendliness of the girls in the training center. We had some good time chatting and we shared a common interest together, which is taking pictures!! I think girls all over the world would have this common interest; we just love to take picture. Pose, pose, and pose, Girls!!

By the time we reached Brother Reuben’s house it was almost 12 midnight.

DAY TWO – (20 May 2009)

Brother Reuben was late in picking us up!!! Hehe =) It was ok... grace and I had more time to take more pictures.

We had fast food “Jolibee” for breakfast. I would think that Malaysian is a fan for rice but I realized people in Philippine are not just a fan but they are crazy for rice!! And man, they would eat rice for breakfast, lunch, dinner, tea time, supper and all the time!! Yup, so you can guess what we had for breakfast that day. RICE in a fast food outlet!!

We are truly blessed to meet with the missionary Brother Bill Ossion and his wife. The wife was sharing her experiences and love for the people in Philippine with Sis Vivian, Grace and I. It was a blessed time to hear from her. Her heart is for the Muslim in the Philippine, she shared how much these people need Jesus but sadly the workers are few.



Matthew 9:37 “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into the harvest field.”

Amazing grace... how sweet the sound

This morning as I was mediating in my Lord's teaching, I learned two important lessons. I'm afraid that I would forget this great lesson so I need to jot it down somewhere. hehe

1) Troubles in life is not always BAD. As for a Christian, troubles in life is an open door for us to experience His grace and power. If we would just endure for another minute in our trouble to come to God in persistent prayer and to wait upon Him, we will then have the privilege to see God work through our troubles. I know how difficult it is to be shaken and to easily taking matter in our own hand when troubles come, but if we took the matter in our own hand we would had missed the privilege and blessing of seeing God solving our problem in His power and grace. As for a Christian, our trouble always end with HOPE IN CHRIST.

2) I learned that once we became a Christ's follower, we are immediately given a task to fulfill. It is like when you became a doctor, you are to fulfill the task to save life and help the sick. When you became a soldier, you are to fulfill the task to protect your nation and the citizen. When you became a teacher, you are to fulfill the task to teach the student. When we became a Christian we are to fulfill the task to win souls for Jesus, that is our ultimate role, our ultimate calling not for a certain Christians, not just for the church leaders, but for everyone who trust and believe in Jesus Christ.

2 Timothy 4:5-6 (New International Version)
But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.

However, sadly many treated their Christian faith as a religion which to me religion fall into the same category as hobby.

The whole illustration is if you are a doctor but not fulfilling our role to save people but instead you did not practice what you had learned in medic school but instead you did something else which less important.

start with a song

As I was spending some time with the Lord this morning, the song book that I messily put on my messy table caught my eye.
So I thought maybe I can sing a song of worship to Jesus that morning.
Well, you see.. I seldom sing during my morning devotion because my husky-jst-wokeup-voice may just SCARED OFF Jesus. hehehe..

Anyway, I prayed that God would give me a song to sing for Him that morning.
And I stopped at song 505. (key G) ..hehe

Yesuslah Tuhan yang layak ditinggikan
Layak disembah atas suku-suku bangsa
Dengan darahMu Kau t'lah tebus bangsaKu
Genapi Tuhan FirmanMu atast negeriku

Hatiku rindu meliah kemuliaanMu
Hatiku rindu melihat curahan kuasaMu
Di tanah tercinta negara Malaysia
Ku berdoa Malaysia penuh kemuliaanMu
Malaysia bagi kemuliaanMy

The tune of this song was naturally sang out through my husky voice.. and I was praising God and claiming Malaysia for Jesus.

I must not forget the vision that I got this morning.. Lord, I pray let it stay burdened in my heart until your will is done through me. Claiming Malaysia back to the Lord. Malaysia, a city of God..

How can I do that? I do not know....
I want to see the young people in Malaysia turn to Jesus and that we can receive redemption through Jesus Christ. All of us...

song 505 rocks!!

Compassion

Must see this!

We are prone to feel immune when we see a video like this. Somehow it is just difficult to feel compassion, as if our heart could not relate to it and as if our heart as hard as a rock. I tried but I realized I can't force to be compassionate or act our compassion.
This heart of compassion can only comes from the heart of Jesus. He is compassionate. It can only comes from Him.. (I guess) - just sharing my little thoughts here.


Oh Lord, I want a heart like you... a heart full of compassion.

p/s: thanks to by lovely lil brother (sai loh) who make me understand and helped me to see what being compassion is all about. thanks for the CD. I still have a long way to learn.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2x22CkAEeA&feature=related

"Life is sucks!"

"Life is sucks"

(Now, parents please don't throw stone to crucified me yet. I apologies for the offensive language but I'm proving a point =)

This phrase is so often used in our today's generation.

When we faced a obstacle in life, we'll say; "Life sucks!"
When a bird ter-shit on our head, we'll say; "Life sucks!"
When we failed our exam, we'll says; "Life sucks!"
When we are bored... I mean really very bored.., we'll says; "Life sucks!"
When our laptop went "cacat", we'll says; "Life sucks!"
When we can't afford to buy our favorite bag from ROXY, we'll says; "Life sucks!"
Even when we study too much today, (come one everyone say with me...) "Life sucks!!!!!!"

People says it so often that it had very much became a "slang" where the meaning of it matter less.

I, myself are not better than anyone hahaha, yesterday night as I was in my casual conversation with God, grumbling with Him about something that I don't quite well remember now. I unconsciously uttered to him, "Life is sucks, Lord". Straight away I felt the Holy Spirit squeezing my heart, so I bow down to His Sovereignity asking for forgiveness.

Now now now... telling the one that had given you life and that the life that He has given you is actually sucks. MMmmhh that is not a too clever thing to do!!!

Kena la aku kali ini..!! I heard the Father saying, "Do you have the right to say, "Life sucks" while I am the one that given you life each day. I was there to protect you each day and night that no one will lay a hand to you. I feed you and provide for you today, tomorow and every single day to come. I love and care for you and give the best to your life, even I had given my Son, Jesus for you, so you can live a life that are free and in joy," said God.

Come to think of it, we really didn't have any right at all to say that "Life sucks!"

Because Jesus had did too much for us so that we can have life. It worth HIS own life. Life never sucks, when Jesus are the one that gave it.

May you view life.... worth living for.

Ruth, a thinker?! =)

I am a thinker, not the intelligent thinker that goes around asking difficult questions and giving mind stressing, hair pulling kind of philosophy concepts to everyone that comes my way.

I'm an inside thinker, I would silently questioning why things happen in such way and what can I learn from it. I learned better about myself, about the world I'm living in and about this God that I'm loving very much. Not every time I will get the answer, I realized how things work but much time I left helpless in it.

I, myself are quite a thinker when it comes about matter that relate to God. He is the most important in my life. Almost all the time I'm a positive thinker but sometime I shunned even to some of the question that I would ponder about. "Is God treating us like a puppet?", "Would God let me be hurt so He can prove His point?", "Is God only care for His work and ministry, what about me and giving me rest?", "Is God mighty to save me.. really?", "If the power of prayer so powerful, why does Christian end up in a cruel persecution like the incident in India, didn't the Christian there prayed for protection too?", "How far would God go to save me.. Will He really do that? "What if I had sinned and fail Him, would He still protect me?"

This proven that I too am weak and have little faith when I face giant's trouble.

(It is ok to question God just like I did, but we need to keep looking for the answer in His word. Some just like to question God but I like to know the answer to the questions.)

Malaysia has hope!

As I was reading the news today in page 22 (the star) about "Abducted man escapes after cops stop car."

I thank God that the police actually took the initiative to stop the car when there saw suspicious behavior of the occupants. If they did not, the Bangladeshi's man may be in danger. They actually save his life.

Even though this is a small news but I'm actually very proud of our Polis Diraja, though all my life I heard many many negative remarks about the police on our country due to corruption but things are looking better, I can really see the police forces is rising up. I'm so proud of you guys.

Not always a spoil apple will spoiled the whole baskets of apples.

Lord Jesus, Thank you for loving our country. Thank you Jesus for loving our nation. Lord, I pray for our Polis Diraja, Lord may you help them to do their duty with integrity, may you protect them from all temptations. Lord Jesus, help them to be the protector our the public, to help and to protect the public. Lord Jesus, I pray may you raise up more good police who love the nation and people and who will do their job with intergrity and passion, for the sake of our country. May your name Jesus be blessed and glorified. In Jesus name, I pray Amen.

Don't be a soccer's spectator!! plsss..!

Last Sunday, it was Rev. Eddie's ordination. Congrats rev. Eddie tan!! Now be a good boy and don't hack my msn or FB's message anymore. =)

It was a wonderful service because it was a privilege to hear three powerful and noble Rev. speaking at the same night, there were Rev. Dr. Isaac Yim, Rev Dr. John Ong and Rev. Ker Kiat Bin. Each of their message was bold, straight to the heart and very de powerful! I was truly blessed.

However, I would like to bring to attention a note spoken by Rev. Ker that night. He was giving exhortation to encourage Rev. Eddie. He make an illustration of the soccer's spectator and the soccer's player to make a point that the spectators are always in more number than the players on the field, and in addition the spectators make the most comment while watching others sweat and play.

A spectator will be sitting comfortably on the sofa in their own house and screaming, "Aiyooo how can you kick like this?", "Look at the way he run, he must have taken bribe!", "Aiyooo, how come so easy also cannot goal, if I play I would have goal 100 times already!" and etc......


They will give all negative comments and judge any small little mistakes that they could found on the players. They would want to make 100 changes but never do they want to implement it themselves.

This is a very common ground that all leaders would face including myself.

My own encounter with these spectators:
It is hard to be a leaders; it is harder when you have a bunch of soccer's spectators on your back trying to teach you how to run, and how to kick a ball, while you have been kicking it for a long time.

It is always a very painful experience for the leaders when hurtful remark has made to their wholehearted service to the Lord. However, not the entire comments from the spectator is bad, those who commented and then with love and prayers really want the good for the team, then it is different.

When someone make an easy-way-out comments to someone's work for the Lord, it will discouraged the leader. "Leadership landmine - Discouragement was the biggest killer of leadership!!"

I urge you friends, I know how easy we would fall into the category of soccer's specatators, I'm guilty of it too. But when there is no love, no prayers in our heart then let us keep the comments to ourselve, because your remark may be the cause of a leader to quit it ministry. It's important that we as a body of Christ support one another in love.

In Matthew 9: 35 -37
"Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagagues, preaching the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harrashed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, THE HARVEST IS PLENTIFUL BUT THE WORKERS ARE FEW. ASK THE LORD OF HARVEST, THEREFORE TO SEND OUT WORKERS INTO HIS HARVEST FIELD."

If your heart is stirring for the people and for the ministry, don't just stop at making comment to the leaders, but join them in the field to win this battle for Christ.

His name alone deserved all our hearts,
His name alone deserved all our pains,
His name alone deserved all our lives.
May you be a player not a spectator. For His GLory sake.

Matthew 20:28
"Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many."

"Come, follow me;" Jesus said. (Matthew 4:19)

God bless your heart.

Appreciation to the kind policemen.

What a wonderful morning! It is His grace that had put a smile on my face.
In this wonderful morning, I would want to remember that Jesus is the source of my strenght and the source of my HOPE.

What a grace of God, that my family and I are safe in His mighty hand yesterday night.

At about 8PM my dad, mom and I were on the way to my aunt's house in Old Klang Road. My aunt's mother in law just passed away on Wednesday morning and we were on the way to the funeral that night.

In addition, being overwhelmed by this sad news, I fall sick that afternoon and was down with fever. It was amazing what 2 Panadols and a soundless sleep can do. I was all well in the evening.

Let me continue, my mom was driving us to aunt's place with her new car that we just got last month. It was drizzling and the road was wet, so my mom did not have a chance to speed (thank God for that). As she pressed the gas because it was going up hill, out of sudden our car swung to the right and hit hard on the divider. It was out of control and the impact was very strong until I felt that our car are near to overturn.


I was calling out to my mom and thank God she pressed the break all the way and we able to have control of the car again. To be honest it happened so quickly that at the moment you just feel a flash of light passes you (well, that probably the headlight of the coming car that was on our left hehe) and I didn't have time to pray or go through the ACTS where I pray by giving adoration to God first and then confess my sins and etc.. it was so fast. At that time, all I can do is surrendering it to the Lord.

What a wonderful thing to be a Christian, that at moment when we face near death, when we don't even have time to utter a prayer, we know that we can surrender to this Loving God who cares for us. So yes, at that very moment I was surrendering to God.

well... the good part is coming.

So we parked at the side of the road, after all the 'fast and furious' stunt. We kind of release that no one was hurt. I was thanking Jesus for His protection because I believe worst can happen we may go out of control and hit another car or go over the bridge. God was good.

I thank God for all my leaders and friends who have been praying for me daily. Thru their prayers the Lord has protected me and His grace was upon my family and I. All glory and praises to Jesus.

ok ok here is the best part...

3 minutes after we parked at the side, my dad and me pretending to fix the burst tyre, where i believe that my dad has no idea how to change a tyre before haha neither than I. It was such a dangerous spot because others car are driving very close to us.

A police car pull over in front of us and here came the most nice and kind and gentle and lovely policemen. Trust me the moment he came out of the car it reminded me of "Fox Mulder" (from X-files) who always there to protect princess "Scully". haha ok I'm getting into fantasy now..

Back to the reality.. I mean the story. He came out of the car with another older policemen who keep talking and talking all the time but not doing anything. So, FBI agent Fox Mulder asked my mom to open the trunk to get the spare tyre. Without saying anything he took the tools and the tyre and start changing the tyre for us. So man laaaaaaa.....

So yup ruth and her family were saved and was brought to safety by FBI Agent Fox Mulder.

Btw his name is "Chiong". (My mom peep on his badge)
My parent and I thank you for helping us.

God's was gracious.. somehow last night I was sleeping being very secure.

He is one and may be the only nicest policemen I ever met so far. May the Lord raise more good and kind policemen in our country. In Jesus name Amen.

pictures ROCK

Sentuh Hatiku

Wow.. at last I able to upload this video phew. Took forever!!

When I heard of this song, it reminded me of the unconditional LOVE of a father to its children.

I had post this up in my facebook, you ca check out the lyric in the facebook link.

http://www.facebook.com/feeds/share_posts.php?id=693403687&viewer=693403687&key=5260d3832f&format=rss20

One of my friends commented that only Christian has the privilege to call our God, Father which is why in Christianity its always more than a religion: It is a RELATIONSHIP

The love that the Father (God) has for us, is ever more than anything we can imagine. I pray may my God reveal His love for you.

May you too, have the privilege like me and my friends to have a relationship with this loving God whom we call Father.

Kasih Nya tak pernah berhenti.

Music influence people to take drug?

I just realised that above the article about the schoolgirl with ketamine was the news about "Night fever at the council- Techno music played at meeting to plug for more disco licences..." where MPK enforcement, business and health department director Zulkifli Majid, proposing tge increase in disco licences.

Rubbish Rubbish Rubbish!!!

Do they see what will happened if more license to be given out? It will only encourage more young people to hang around places in pub and disco, where more drugs, more AIDS, more crime, bringing destruction to our country. Oh I see, i bet he was thinking that techno music can make youths a healthier person!! (rolling eyes)

Whether we would admit it or not? that techno music will have influence upon us, our thoughts, our behaviors, our values!

ARTICLE: RECREATION DRUG USE AND RISK ESTIMATION
BY: Johanne Korsdal Sørensen

Techno events sometimes take place at legal music venues, such as discotheques
and other licensed premises, but they may also take the form of illegal,
underground parties at unlicensed locations such as abandoned factory buildings.
Some of these events are large-scale parties involving up to one thousand
participants; others are smaller private gatherings. During my research I
participated in both kinds of events. So-called “after-parties” are either relaxing
intermezzos between two parties, or represent the termination of a techno party.
On these occasions “blunting” drugs (cannabis, benzodiazepines and others) are
often taken in order to counteract the intoxicating effect of the “uppers” taken
during the main event.3 In other words, recreational drug users tend to use
“uppers” to speed up the tempo and stay awake during the techno events
themselves, but finish off the party by taking tranquillisers and blunting drugs in
order to calm down and get back to the ordinary rhythm of day and night. These
phenomena appear to be characteristic of techno culture globally (Carrington &
Wilson 2002, 85).

The international diffusion of these various techno genres has been accompanied
by a similar exchange and development of dancing techniques and ways of
partying, including the use of drugs. Thus techno fans globally are now well
informed about the particular use of drugs in relation to techno music. My
informants told me about travelling to the “Ministry of Sound” in England, to the
“Love Parade” in Germany, and to locations in Ibiza, Goa and elsewhere to
participate in major techno events. They and others like them are among the
couriers who have brought techno and a new kind of recreational drug use to
Denmark, and in turn spread knowledge of the scene in Denmark to other venues
elsewhere in the world.

.........................................................................................................
Noted that this articles was 16 pages long and I was only quoted two paragraph, please read through the whole context and find more information about it.

http://www.nad.fi/pdf/46/6%20Korsdal%20Sorensen.pdf

Personally, in my own view. Techno music does influenced young people to do drug.

Mr Zulkilfi, please be wise in your decision.

School girl caught with ketamine

Today I read another very sad news on the newspaper.

"A 15 year old schoolgirl (Form 2) and four boys aged between 15 and 17 were remanded for four days on suspicion of possessing 9.4gm of ketamine."

What is happening to this world?!!

I'm going above just "being sad", by these two news alone I realized that drug are one of the major problem for youths nowaday, especially for colleges students. I'm fearful for my youths who are in colleges now. May the Lord watch over them and delivered them from all temptation. God please protect them from drug!!

If this is the major problem that this generation of youths is facing, DRUG! I better learn more about it (haha aiyo i don't mean tasting drug myself laa) and I better get to know more organization that can help educate youths to "SAY NO TO DRUG" so I can work together with them.

Anyone have any idea any organization that I can go to?

Monday March 30, 2009

Cops uncover drug den

DUNGUN: Police, acting on a tip-off about a “dangerous kidnapper” at a house in Taman Mutiara, found 12 youths high on drugs instead.

The 20-year-old alleged kidnapper was among those arrested in the raid yesterday.

Others included nine college students. Police believe they have a new lead on the operations of a pusher supplying drugs to college students.

OCPD Supt Dahlan Mohd Noor said the raid was conducted after police received information that a kidnapper was living in the house.

He said the nine students were pursuing their diploma in mechanical engineering at a nearby institute.

“We never expected to catch the students. Recently, we embarked on a campaign to remind students not to take drugs but it seems to have been unsuccessful,” he added.

...................................................................................................................................................................

12 YOUTHS HIGH ON DRUGS!!!! This news troubled my heart so much. Nine out of 12 are college students. What are the teacher doing in colleges? It make me ponder a bit what has becoming with our education nowaday? What about caring for the youths? What about seeing and followup what happening to their students?

Forgive me for falling into the hand of "pointing finger" to others but I tend to ponder that if our education would be better, the youths that we are nurturing would choose better choices in life. Why does our education only stop at academic? It should go beyond academic!

I felt so burden for these group of youths who never knew what a beauty in life that awaiting for them ? Instead of wasting away their life, I hope they can see that God want them to live and have life to the abundant!! God loves them and they too deserved to live a good life. But to have a good life, we need to start making right decisions.

Mengampuni - jason

This song brought light to me.

All the frustrations, silence hurts, discrimination, wrong accusations, false testimonies toward me has brought me to a time of darkness, where I could not see others through God's compassion and grace. Most of all, I lost patience and lost the love for them.

I have been loving this song the first time I heard it. I love the melody but did not spend much time in learning what is the song all about until just now. I search the lyric on the net and all the words sink in like a coming big wave that came and took all my hurts and unforgiving spirit away.

God is compassionate, forgiving and gracious Lord. This is my God and it is for me to follow His ways. Oh.. God break my heart for what break Yours.

Please check out this song, it is not in Youtube, but you can get the MP3 from me.



Mengampuni - Jason

D F#m Bm
KETIKA HATIKU TLAH DISAKITI
G F#m Em A
AJARKU MEMBERI HATI MENGAMPUNI
D F#m Bm
KETIKA HIDUPKU TLAH DIHAKIMI
G F#m Em A
AJARKU MEMBERI HATI MENGASIHI

REFF:
G A F#m Bm Em
AMPUNI BILA KAMI TAK MAMPU MENGAMPUNI
A Am D
YANG BERSALAH KEPADA KAMI
G A F#m Bm
SEPERTI HATI YESUS MENGAMPUNI
Em A D
MENGASIHI TIADA PAMRIH

Not retaliate!

God never fails speaking to me directly through through His word alone. Having my daily devotion, to me is the most important thing. It is where the Lord spoke like a clear thunder. His word are always comforting and assuring in helping me through all circumstances in life, whether it is bad or good. God's word is living and real, it is applicable everyday.

This morning before I came to His word I was praying with such burden and troublesome heart. I shunned before my enemies, I felt so weak and I do not know what I can do? As we called to be minister for God, we are to be prepare that our enemies from every side will come to us like a roaring lion trying to grab our helpless sheep away. It was such a sadness for me that I can't do anything.

Before I decided to rise up and be angry with all my enemies, trying to scold them with my best strength, telling them that there are influencing the youths in a bad way. It was example of my fleshly respond, I want justice now. I want God to make them pay for their wrong doing. Forgive my offensive remarks but it takes a minister to understand the sadness that I felt.

Then I ran to His word and the Lord gave me Matt 5:38 - 42. The Lord led me to see my enemies through His eyes of grace. It helped me to see this whole situation in His way.

Matthew 5: 38 - 41, "You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you. Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you."

I learned two great lessons today which help me to settle my troubling heart

1) I learned about true grace. Our natural reaction when we were hit by ours opponent is to defend, to stand up and repay them an eye for an eye ( haha.. don't worry on one lost any eyes in the process of writing this blog =) I bet Jesus will choose not to retaliate and would turn the other cheek. Even though in the eyes of people we may appear weak by not retaliate, but by knowing the true grace in the Lord and refuse to retaliate, we are overcoming evil with good. Jesus say we are to love our enemies. By seeing His grace to me, I can only love my enemies with this same grace He would show me.

2) I almost forgot that being in partnership with God to do this ministry; I got to remember that He still reign over all. I need to have true faith in believing that at this moment where the evil reign, the sheep gone astray, I am to believe that God is not blind nor will He be deaf to my prayer and cry. The sheep is His and He shall call them back and then the evil ones will be under His judgment. My duty is not to be God, but to do the task that the Lord has for me faithfully and with both true grace and true faith in Him. "If someone forces me to go one mile, I will go two miles"

Lord I pray that my heart will filled with Your grace and love, so that I can love my enemies, just like my Master does. Amen.

It's all for Christ!

Am I being treated unfairly? Yes, I am
Am I being criticize? Yes, every single day
Am I crying so painfully for the youths? Yes, only God knows.
Am I working hard trying very hard? Yes, I am
Am I being snare off? Yes, even by the person whom I put much effort in.
Am I being wrongfully accused? Yes, I am
Am I being outcast for pleasing the Lord? Yes, I am
Do I enjoy what I am doing? I can't deny that I am a bit doubtful now.
But will I continue doing it, teaching my youth? loving my youths, surrender my all for the youths? Yes I will.

Because of Jesus.. Jesus loves them very much, so do I (even though sometime it hurt badly)

Does anyone hear her - casting crowns

This MTV is the coolest.

I could not express my emotions when I first watch this MTV, my hair just stand up.. ok i may have exaggerate hahaha

But it was a very cool music video, full of meaning.

Casting crowns is a Christian band who have won in Grammy and Dove Award. Their music considered as soft rock. This band was created in 1999 by a youth pastor. Wohohoh Youth pastor ROCKS!! Well, guys watch out, a youth pastor in Malaysia may be coming with a band soon muahaha.

Jokes aside, the lyric of this song is serious stuff.

These scenes are just too familiar to churches in today's generation, where Christians walking pass those who are hurting and needs God without noticing them. It was a wonderful MTV again and I just love it. Every time when I watch this video, I'll pray that I will not do the same to these people whom God loves very much.

LYRIC:
She is running
A hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction
She is trying
But the canyon's ever widening
In the depths of her cold heart
So she sets out on another misadventure just to find
She's another two years older
And she's three more steps behind

Chorus:
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Lord does anybody even know she's going down today?
Under the shadow of our steeple
With all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?

She is yearning
For shelter and affection
That she never found at home
She is searching
For a hero to ride in
To ride in and save the day
And in walks her prince charming
And he knows just what to say
Momentary lapse of reason
And she gives herself away

Chorus

If judgement looms under every steeple
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we never even met her

If judgement looms under every steeple
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we never even met her

Chorus 2x

He is running a hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction

Undignified Singapore 2009

Henry made me laughed..
Singapore's gangster headed by tai ko Ashley...
Pengemis di Sinpapore..
Pengemis and the beauty.. (kidding brother ;p)
very nature.. nice pic

Undignified Singapore 2009

Ruth going super undignified.....
Poser konon...... a nice hangout place
Our prof photographer................
Model cum photographer.......
Whose hand is this..?

"Woe to me" I cried. "I am ruined". Isaiah 6:5

My greatest fear when I serve God as a leader of the church is that I may fall and become a Pharisee.

I hate Pharisees and religious teachers that mentioned in the Bible, well most obvious reason is because they crucified Jesus. MMh... And as I went for the study of Matthew last year in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) I found more reasons NOT to become like them.

(1) What Jesus says of them, "You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath? Produce fruit in keeping with repentance." Matthew 3:7

(2) "The Pharisees and Sadducees came to Jesus and tested him.... " Matthew 16:1

(3) "Then some of the Pharisees and teachers of the law said to him, "teacher, we want to see a miraculous sign from you?" Matthew 12:38

(4) "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the kingdom of heaven in men's faces." Matthew 23:13

(5) Lastly.... "As soon as the chief priests and their officials saw Jesus, they shouted, "Crucify! Crucify!" John 19:6

I am a person no greater than Pharisee, sometime I was as worst as them.

Being a leader and a teacher, many time unconsciously, I feel into the trap of being self-righteous, and I have hurt many of my youths and friends whom I dearly love. I found that it is very easy for us to fall into an attitude that say "I'm more holy than you.." Even though it is my duty to reconcile youths who had drawn far from God, to preach the message of repentance, but a cynical remark and a harsh rebuke is not it!! There is something that I missed while doing these,....I missed grace and a love-filled heart!!

I just do not know what to do, Lord?!

Past few weeks ago, pastor was preaching on Isaiah 6:1-9 in the Sunday Service. Believe it or not? God spoke to me through this passage and there were few incidents when I was in bookstore browsing through some books and I came about this same passage. IT WAS AMAZING, happened twice!! Well Pastor, need to preach it again in the staff morning devotion, with these double doze from pastor who will forget the message.


It says in Isaiah 6:5 - Woe to me, I cried. I am ruined! ....

Woe to me Lord, I am ruined. - Ruthie

My prayer is that I will teach like Jesus not the Pharisees...